Packaging

I remember when toothpaste came in a tube. It was made out of heavy-duty aluminum foil, and to get at the toothpaste you needed only to unscrew the cap and squeeze the tube. You could easily get enough to brush your teeth (a tiny dab), or enough to please the toothpaste company (a large glob). You could roll up the tube from the end, to save space and make sure you got every last glob, and you could leave off the cap, to save effort on the next use. Leaving off the cap guaranteed there would be a healthy glob sitting on the counter, ready and waiting to be brushed up for the next brushing.

Today toothpaste still comes in tubes, but also in aerosol cans, or in canisters with pumps, or in multi colors, or with stripes, or in pumps with multi colors and stripes. All these “improvements” reduce the amount of usable toothpaste in each container and, what a surprise, increase the cost. And the tubes, now always with non-removable caps, are no longer roll-up-able, recyclable aluminum having been abandoned for the far more environmentally friendly plastic. Of course, every container is available with a “tamper proof” (meaning nearly impossible to open) top. I didn’t realize that toothpaste was “tamper prone.” Perhaps I’m just not up to date on the staggering number of people who accidentally overdose on toothpaste every year.

“Blister Packaging” is a wonderful invention: at least it is for retailers, not so much for shoppers. In case you haven’t shopped in the last few years, a “blister package” is a large package that surrounds pretty much anything small enough to fit in your pocket. Based on the assumption that many, if not most, shoppers will steal anything pocket size or smaller, the “Blister Pack” is also “tamper proof” (I think I see a pattern developing here) and designed to be difficult to circumvent (meaning open). Usually clear (so you can clearly see what it is you can’t get to), it is also, usually, manufactured from plastic. Once home, the package can easily be circumvented (meaning opened) with a pair of industrial grade metal cutting shears. It you aren’t in possession of such, the packaging, though extremely tough, is usually not bulletproof. If you own a gun, however, you probably own industrial grade metal cutting shears, and I strongly urge you to use the shears, for obvious, I hope, reasons.

“Packing Peanuts,” manufactured from Styrofoam, a type of, you guessed it, plastic, is a package cushioning material so named because it originally resembled peanuts. Pretty much anything you order online (pretty much your only option if you live in Hawaii, but that’s another story) will arrive in a large box inside of which will reside a little box surrounded by “Packing Peanuts.” In the old days we used to bunch up old newspapers, which served the same purpose beautifully, but I guess online retailers don’t get the paper. Is it just me, or wouldn’t it make sense for someone to gather up the millions of old newspapers (old being a whole day old) and get them to the online retailers? They might even pay for the newspapers with the money they save from not buying “Packing Peanuts.”

What I find interesting is the fact that the item inside the little box will undoubtedly be surrounded by custom fitted Styrofoam body armor, designed to withstand any assault short of a nuclear explosion. And, just in case that is not sufficient, if the item is small enough to fit in your pocket, it will, of course, be “Blister Packaged.”